Another car drove by and it too tossed some garbage. Just as before, the traffic was too busy. Vehicles proceeded to pass by throwing garbage until finally the cops had an opening to pull over a car which had a guy and a girl in it. The police had the man back up to retrieve garbage, which turned out to be a used condom. One of the cops said, "You know there are huge fines for littering on this highway". To which the motorist replied with a satisfied look on his face, "that's not litter, it orgasmic material!"
~~~~~*****~~~~~
My parents recently retired. Mom always wanted to learn to play the piano, so dad bought her a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, I asked how she was doing with it. "Oh, we returned the piano." said My Dad, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet instead."
"How come?" I asked. "Because," he answered, "with a clarinet, she can't sing."
~~~~~*****~~~~~
A man asked his wife what she'd like for her 40th birthday. "I'd love to be six again," she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow! Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney and what a fabulous adventure!
Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed. He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?" One eye opened. "You idiot, I meant my dress size." The moral of this story is: When a woman speaks and a man is actually listening, he will still get it wrong.
~~~~~*****~~~~~
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